What’s up with bess love?
I’ve had some writer's block lately when it comes to newsletters. So, I took a month off. Then another. I’ve really enjoyed this spaciousness in my life. It has allowed me to get in touch with what was blocking one of my favorite artistic expressions. Anger. Rage. Grief.
This last year has been a lot of healing from heartbreak for me: Questioning who I am after a relationship ended, my sweet dog passing away, the state of our world and feeling helpless within it to make any changes of significance. I’m not sharing this for sympathy — I have a very supportive community all around me — but rather to be myself with you.
My mission in this work is to show up as myself, not just at home in my sweatpants, but everywhere:
In a crowd of strangers, in session with a client, on social media, driving in rush-hour traffic.
How can I be more fully me on any given day?
And not just the bright, shiny, sexy me, but also the grieving, sullen, unsexy me. And every nuance in-between.
The gift of intimacy is to allow a space for both of us to strip off our masks, our preconceived notions, our stories of who we think we are, and to just be. It’s something I practice every day. Being. Existing. Fully alive in what appears. Because how can I let you come as you are if I can’t do the same for myself?
I just got back from a Tantra facilitator training in Cabo, Mexico. It was such a humbling experience to be in a group of 20 for nine days. I haven’t been in a group in quite a while and my hermit self was on edge at the beginning! I let myself be in the discomfort of being seen by so many. I had some amazing connections and some uncomfortable ones, too. Such is life in a community! I’m grateful for it all. I’m grateful that I love to push my edges because I know that’s where real growth comes from.
I’m feeling a nudge to be in larger groups more frequently. To get out of my house/comfort zone more. To let myself see and be seen. The anger, grief and helplessness are all more manageable when we come together. I feel more alive than I have in a long time!
Out of all of this above came a new erotic persona just in time for my birthday. Some of you have already met her on OnlyFans: The Birthday Fairy! She’s a beacon of joy and celebration for the birth of all beings past, present and future. She celebrates life and the passage of time. I felt really called to bring some sparkles, glitter and cupcakes into my life. Life is worth celebrating!
No matter the time of year, I always welcome gifting. Click here to buy me something special off my wishlist!
